


We’re not broken just bent (And we can learn to love again)

by Professional--griefers (Bosh_tet)



Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, M/M, Reconciliation, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-21
Updated: 2013-04-21
Packaged: 2017-12-09 01:59:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/768660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bosh_tet/pseuds/Professional--griefers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i></i>He shouldn’t have expected anything different considering everything that had happened. He had gotten taken by those people and Anders couldn’t do anything about it.<i></i></p><p>Something I wrote for my girlfriend for her birthday.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We’re not broken just bent (And we can learn to love again)

Anders sighed, staring at Leon's sleeping form on the couch. He was standing in the hallway, partially concealed by shadows. It had been a month since he had gotten Leon to stay at his house. But when he had offered to share his bed Leon just sneered at him, stole some covers off his bed, and went to claim the living room as his. Leaving him alone. Which caused him to roam the house aimlessly late into the night, sometimes stopping to look at Leon and wonder why everything that could have gone wrong did.

 He shouldn't have expected anything different considering everything that had happened. He had gotten taken by those people and Anders couldn't do anything. And when he tried he had found Leon in such a horrid state that he couldn't feel his pulse. If he had known it was just so faint it was almost non-existent he would have picked him up and fought past whoever he had to to get him out.

 This was his fault.

 He left Leon behind.

 He deserved no better.

 Little did he know Leon was still awake. And he could feel as well as slightly see the human watching him, and he knew what he was thinking “What are you looking at?” he asked, not moving in the slightest.

 Anders jumped, not expecting that “Nothing. Just going to get something to drink.”

 The cat sighed and sat up “Don't lie to me.”

 Anders leaned against the wall, staring down at the floor “Really, it's nothing. I just need some scotch in me is all.” he started towards the kitchen, feeling Leon's eyes on him the entire time.

 He got up and followed him “Tell me what's on your mind.”

 "Why do you care?”

 Leon stopped. He didn't really know why he cared, he just...... Did. He shouldn't though. Anders had left him with those people, didn't give a damn about him. So why was he giving a damn about him now? “I don't care,” he lied “But maybe you telling me what's wrong will get you to not stared at me while I sleep like a creep.”

 Anders grabbed a glass out of the cabinet and sat it on the counter before getting out a bottle and pouring the contents into his cup. He drank the whole thing and replied while he was pouring more “I was just thinking about what things used to be like.”

 “Oh? About how we used to be before you abandoned me?”

 Anders' grip tightened on his glass as he drank more “I didn't.” he said through gritted teeth.

 Leon crossed his arms in front of his chest and stared at him “Then why were the last few years of my life spent with those fucks who treated me more like a cat,” he pointed at his ears “Than a human.”

 Anders turned around to face him “That wasn't my fault. I tired to save you.”Leon scoffed and rolled his eyes “Bullshit. They told me you never even bothered looking for me.”

 Anders deadpanned and gave him a blank stare “And you believed them?” he asked, incredulity in his voice “After all they've done and you believed them when they told that I, the person that was IN LOVE WITH YOU, didn't come for you!?”

 Leon stared at him, the way Anders was talking making him feel incredibly stupid “Y-Yes.” he stammered, gaze dropping to the floor.

 Anders sighed and sat the glass back on the counter. He moved over to him and grabbed his hands, pulling them up and holding them to his chest “Leon, I tried. I tried really hard. And yes, I know my hardest wasn't good enough, and I failed you. And I'm sorry, if I could go back and change that day I would. But I can't. I can't undo everything's that gone wrong. But never, not for a minute, think that I left you. That I didn't care.”

 Leon just stared blankly at Anders' chest “Then why-”

 “Why did you wake up with them instead of me? Because I thought you were dead. When I found you, you were cold and pale. I checked your pulse multiple times, and I checked your breathing and your heartbeat and I found nothing. I left your body there that day with my heartbroken. I thought I had lost you. And thinking that I was never going to get to see you again, or hear you talk...” he stopped to blink away tears “That I was never going to get to kiss you or hugs you again. I was never going to be able to tell you how much I love you, it tore me up inside. That's why my life went to shit. It was because I missed you and I hated myself so much. I thought myself worthless and useless and I guess I beat that into my head so much that I believed it and just gave up and let everything good I had going for me go to hell because I felt I didn't deserve it.”

 He looked up at him through his lashes “I'm sorry. I-I didn't know.”

 Anders just sighed and let go of his hands “It's fine. You were scared and upset. I can understand that.” he grabbed his glass and finished off his drink before starting towards his room.

 Leon just stands in the kitchen, looking down at his feet. He felt terrible and so stupid. Anders had said it was fine but was it really. He had believed the scientists that had done everything they could to hurt him. And he could hear Anders saying _“Leon, you've been hurt all your life. You're going to be bitter, you're going to believe everything horrible that you hear because you're so used to it and why shouldn't it be true.”_

Of course he would, he always said things like that. Always understood and never judged. Which only made the fact that he believed them all the worse.  

 He watched Anders walk away, not able to make himself follow. Instead he waited till he was out of sight before slinking back to the couch and laying down, pulling the covers over his head. He laid there thinking before falling into a restless sleep.

                                                                             ~

 The next day they both acted as if nothing had ever happened the night before. They barely talked each other except for Anders occasionally asking him if he was hungry, to which he always replied no.

 Anders hadn't really expected more than that. He didn't honestly think that a couple of words could be said and then everything would be back to normal. Life didn't work like that. And thing's like this took time.

 Leon, on the other hand, was an having an internal struggle with himself. He knew he should forgive Anders and move on but he could get himself to stop being mad. Which only made him more angry. He had no reason to be mad anymore so why was he? Was it still directed towards Anders, or towards himself? He just didn't know.

                                                                                ~

 This went on for days. Days which turned into weeks. And weeks turned into a month before Anders finally gave up. At this point he had resigned hope that Leon was going to forgive him.

 Until one night.

 He was laying in bed, almost asleep, when he heard his bedroom door creak open. He didn't know whether he was dreaming or not but he didn't particularly care.

 Leon stared at him from the door for a second before quietly slipping in and closing the door softly behind him. He tip-toed to the other side of the bed and slipped in under the covers beside the human. He moved closer and wrapped an arm around him.

 At this point Anders had woken up a bit and when he felt that arm go around him was when he cried. He hadn't even cried after he thought Leon was dead. He hadn't the emotions for it. He just felt.... numb. So numb that he couldn't feel anything, not even sad. He had felt them, the tears, every now and again, the warmth of them stinging his eyes but he held it back, knowing that once they came was when he'd feel something and he didn't want that, wasn't ready.

 So he hid.

 But now something broke inside of him and he felt everything. All the hurt he'd bottled up all this time came out.

 Leon could feel when his body started to shake and held him closer, not whole-heartedly prepared for when loud, gut-wrenching sobs started tearing themselves from his human. Anders didn't just cry, he screamed, he chocked on the noise he was making, he whined and whimpered. And he grabbed Leon's arm and held onto it tightly like he was afraid that, if he didn't, Leon was going to leave again.

 And he wasn't going to lie and say he didn't cry, too.

 Finally it all died down and Anders went quiet, tremors still wracking his body. That's when Leon spoke up “I'm sorry.”

 It took a while for Anders to answer but when he did his voice sounded raw “Me, too.”

 Leon kissed the back of his neck “I love you.”

 Anders rolled over and moved a hand up, laying it on his cheek “I love you, too.” he replied quietly, moving into kiss him.

 Leon let him, tentatively returning the gesture. The kiss was soft, long, and sweet, all the years of missed kisses going into it. He almost whined when Anders moved back and laid his head on his chest.

 They fell asleep like that, a couple more tears coming from Anders.

 He smiled when he woke up that next morning and saw Leon there, knowing it wasn't all a dream.

 Things were at least semi-normal again.

 And oh so very right.

 

 


End file.
